"I generally feel like COVID has my relationship with the human world on, at best, life support" whew. amen friend. My sister said she's never felt so "disappointed" in us humans. That word hit me hard. That level of disappointment wiped out a life-time of my most fundamental beliefs, meanings and assumptions--and left precious little outside my own inner resources and a handful of my most inner circle of beloveds. thanks so much for speaking with such clarity about such a fkg muddle!
I always appreciate the complexities you embrace and explore in your writing. Every time I am grateful for the nuance your bring to issues others present as flat, or close to it. This piece particularly struck home. As someone with a high risk partner, I've lost so many friendships through this, and we never ended up emerging from our cove of isolation this summer, because for him there were still significant risks, and there will always be. We haven't travelled, and in many way's we've stayed in the lockdown stages of pandemic watching others move around us.
I thought Jamelle Bouie’s Aug. 13 piece about this “rights based argument” on vaccinations in the Times last week was pretty good: “If American society has been reshaped in the image of capital, then Americans themselves have been pushed to relate to one another and our institutions as market creatures in search of utility, as opposed to citizens bound together by rights and obligations.”
Though I’d argue that the US wasn’t “reshaped” in the image of capital…it was forged in that image as it’s defining feature.
I feel like I’ve never stopped “doing.” I’ve been on the full-tilt boogie for well over a year now. Except that everything has been focused, done from my apartment, or now, our house. I miss traveling and seeing friends. I try to relax as much as I can, and I am a privileged SOB, so I don’t know how everyone is taking it. I don’t want to go back to “before” either. I want us to care about each other. I want to feel like we’re working together, if we have to “work” forever. I’ve pulled away from social media, I mostly talk to friends in DMs. There’s so much negativity. And I don’t mean pointing out inequalities and injustices. You can barely post “I like pie” without hearing someone ask if you like mud pie, or what kind of jerk likes pie. And these are the people who are supposed to be “friends,” not random internet trolls.
I’ve been retreating into books, my own, and others. I read LaRose by Louise Erdrich, my first read of hers, and it won’t be my last. As for me, I have less taste for writing hardboiled. I need there to be hope. Even if it’s fictional.
I feel this so much right now, and it's such a hard energy to hold: "I just know that I don't trust anyone." With you in pulling for the quieter and more peaceful world that's out there somewhere.
I feel like I want to push back on the 'feel superior' point though. Superiority/inferiority isn't a frame that I use pretty much ever (and have had to do some retraining on that), and, honestly, I am not sure you do either. I don't think name calling means I think I'm better, it means I think they're acting badly. How is calling out an anti-vaxxer any different from calling out racist behavior?
Now, there is the question of efficacy, both with regard to anti-vaxxers and racists, and bystanders.
Hence, why, I am again, although fully vaccinated, again wearing a mask out in public and doing more self isolation.
I shrudder o think that I have relatives that are so anti vax. Strictly divided among political lines, with no basis in caring or reality for others or self.
Sorry to hear that you are no longer at Fact and Fiction.
If there is one thing that angers me more than anything else right now, it is people not wearing masks. I'm shocked and appalled at the number of people carrying on as though our numbers aren't spiking and Delta isn't serious shit. Blown away. And so, so disappointed. I just went to the MADE Fair at Caras Park, an event I have loved in the past. I wore my mask. And I couldn't get out of there fast enough. I'm just so done with people.
We felt the same sense of hopefulness, and to be honest, amazement, when we received our vaccinations in early May. We didn't change much about our lifestyles, though. It seemed too overwhelming to travel or attend large social gatherings, and apart from seeing my immediate family and a couple of close friends, we've played it safe and simple, and kept close to home. We took our masks off for a while, but there are back on in indoor spaces. I know of too many breakthrough cases among my extended circle and I also have a dear friend, a strong athlete, age 42, and her experiences with Long Covid are cautionary (she got it prior to the vax being available). My exasperation and disgust at the people who think their "personal choice" is more important than the wellbeing of the collective is beyond words at this point. If they want to risk their lives, so be it, but the health care workers who have to deal with them, or their children, . . . it just burns me up.
Ah Chris, every point you make in this essay mimics what I've encountered and thought. It's almost as if the Idaho/Montana legislatures are joined at the hip. And the level of stubborn, me-first behavior is so disheartening. School is now back in session and we're still arguing about mask mandates. College is in session and the kids seem determined to make up for all the parties they missed last year. (I live blocks from campus so my neighborhood suffers when the kiddies drink.) I so miss the quiet, calm, and peacefulness of May 2020. I know a lot of people struggled with being "locked down," but I loved it and miss it. Although, like most people, I'm also wearing thin about masks, shortages, and especially foolish and belligerent behavior. The one bright star on the horizon is that last spring's legislation that rendered getting an ballot initiative in front of voters all but impossible, has just been ruled unconstitutional by the Supreme Court of this land. Now if the county could just remove the charlatan physician who replaced a highly skilled and experienced epidemiologist on our Board of Health.
Hopefully with today's official approval of the vaccine, some businesses, hospitals, and schools will be able to stand strong with vaccine requirements. It shouldn't have to be so hard to save lives. It's not like we're asking people to undergo experimental heart/lung transplants.
"I generally feel like COVID has my relationship with the human world on, at best, life support" whew. amen friend. My sister said she's never felt so "disappointed" in us humans. That word hit me hard. That level of disappointment wiped out a life-time of my most fundamental beliefs, meanings and assumptions--and left precious little outside my own inner resources and a handful of my most inner circle of beloveds. thanks so much for speaking with such clarity about such a fkg muddle!
I always appreciate the complexities you embrace and explore in your writing. Every time I am grateful for the nuance your bring to issues others present as flat, or close to it. This piece particularly struck home. As someone with a high risk partner, I've lost so many friendships through this, and we never ended up emerging from our cove of isolation this summer, because for him there were still significant risks, and there will always be. We haven't travelled, and in many way's we've stayed in the lockdown stages of pandemic watching others move around us.
Good stuff.
I thought Jamelle Bouie’s Aug. 13 piece about this “rights based argument” on vaccinations in the Times last week was pretty good: “If American society has been reshaped in the image of capital, then Americans themselves have been pushed to relate to one another and our institutions as market creatures in search of utility, as opposed to citizens bound together by rights and obligations.”
Though I’d argue that the US wasn’t “reshaped” in the image of capital…it was forged in that image as it’s defining feature.
You did it again. Words like a prayer. An echo.
Thank you.
I feel like I’ve never stopped “doing.” I’ve been on the full-tilt boogie for well over a year now. Except that everything has been focused, done from my apartment, or now, our house. I miss traveling and seeing friends. I try to relax as much as I can, and I am a privileged SOB, so I don’t know how everyone is taking it. I don’t want to go back to “before” either. I want us to care about each other. I want to feel like we’re working together, if we have to “work” forever. I’ve pulled away from social media, I mostly talk to friends in DMs. There’s so much negativity. And I don’t mean pointing out inequalities and injustices. You can barely post “I like pie” without hearing someone ask if you like mud pie, or what kind of jerk likes pie. And these are the people who are supposed to be “friends,” not random internet trolls.
I’ve been retreating into books, my own, and others. I read LaRose by Louise Erdrich, my first read of hers, and it won’t be my last. As for me, I have less taste for writing hardboiled. I need there to be hope. Even if it’s fictional.
I feel this so much right now, and it's such a hard energy to hold: "I just know that I don't trust anyone." With you in pulling for the quieter and more peaceful world that's out there somewhere.
Great work, as usual.
I feel like I want to push back on the 'feel superior' point though. Superiority/inferiority isn't a frame that I use pretty much ever (and have had to do some retraining on that), and, honestly, I am not sure you do either. I don't think name calling means I think I'm better, it means I think they're acting badly. How is calling out an anti-vaxxer any different from calling out racist behavior?
Now, there is the question of efficacy, both with regard to anti-vaxxers and racists, and bystanders.
Hence, why, I am again, although fully vaccinated, again wearing a mask out in public and doing more self isolation.
I shrudder o think that I have relatives that are so anti vax. Strictly divided among political lines, with no basis in caring or reality for others or self.
Sorry to hear that you are no longer at Fact and Fiction.
If there is one thing that angers me more than anything else right now, it is people not wearing masks. I'm shocked and appalled at the number of people carrying on as though our numbers aren't spiking and Delta isn't serious shit. Blown away. And so, so disappointed. I just went to the MADE Fair at Caras Park, an event I have loved in the past. I wore my mask. And I couldn't get out of there fast enough. I'm just so done with people.
it's astonishing how quickly (used to be) reasonable folk start name calling.
Thanks for your voice
Yes. All of this. Yes. Sigh. So appreciate you hanging in there, with all of us.
We felt the same sense of hopefulness, and to be honest, amazement, when we received our vaccinations in early May. We didn't change much about our lifestyles, though. It seemed too overwhelming to travel or attend large social gatherings, and apart from seeing my immediate family and a couple of close friends, we've played it safe and simple, and kept close to home. We took our masks off for a while, but there are back on in indoor spaces. I know of too many breakthrough cases among my extended circle and I also have a dear friend, a strong athlete, age 42, and her experiences with Long Covid are cautionary (she got it prior to the vax being available). My exasperation and disgust at the people who think their "personal choice" is more important than the wellbeing of the collective is beyond words at this point. If they want to risk their lives, so be it, but the health care workers who have to deal with them, or their children, . . . it just burns me up.
💚
Ah Chris, every point you make in this essay mimics what I've encountered and thought. It's almost as if the Idaho/Montana legislatures are joined at the hip. And the level of stubborn, me-first behavior is so disheartening. School is now back in session and we're still arguing about mask mandates. College is in session and the kids seem determined to make up for all the parties they missed last year. (I live blocks from campus so my neighborhood suffers when the kiddies drink.) I so miss the quiet, calm, and peacefulness of May 2020. I know a lot of people struggled with being "locked down," but I loved it and miss it. Although, like most people, I'm also wearing thin about masks, shortages, and especially foolish and belligerent behavior. The one bright star on the horizon is that last spring's legislation that rendered getting an ballot initiative in front of voters all but impossible, has just been ruled unconstitutional by the Supreme Court of this land. Now if the county could just remove the charlatan physician who replaced a highly skilled and experienced epidemiologist on our Board of Health.
Hopefully with today's official approval of the vaccine, some businesses, hospitals, and schools will be able to stand strong with vaccine requirements. It shouldn't have to be so hard to save lives. It's not like we're asking people to undergo experimental heart/lung transplants.
Same, dude, same. 🖤