When the kid with the Cannibal Corpse tee shirt walked out of the classroom after talking with you, that is the first time I have seen him smile all year.
This was beautiful. I’m going to sit with what you said and read this again later.
I’m one of your newer subscribers, so forgive me if you’ve already addressed this: I’d love to hear the Anisinaabe words pronounced in a video or audio recording. I would love to learn how to say them properly in case I ever meet you in this world or some other. If this already exists, please point me to it!
"It feels like life under genocidal occupation because it is."
Thank you for putting this out there, Chris. It often feels like that to me too but it's hard to talk about.
But back to the language discussion, if you speak American English — take heart! You already know dozens, maybe even hundreds, of Indigenous Turtle Island words. You can't even talk about the native plants and animals without speaking some Algonquian, for instance. Moose, caribou, raccoon, chipmunk, muskrat, persimmon, tamarack, squash, pecan, hickory, etc.
And that's just the tip of the ice burg for only one of the Indigenous language families that contributed to the flavor of English we currently speak. Maybe an additional way we can honor the languages of Turtle Island is to be mindful of all the Indigenous words we are already using?
“the vast majority of Indigenous folks have few, if any, of their traditional language near to their tongue” I am going to quote you while I reprimand people who snidely reject colonialism as a singular event of the past. I’d like to ask them, if it was indeed an event confined to the past with no present impact, how do we explain the loss of native languages and the widespread expectation for everyone to speak English?
I have a deep appreciation for learning new words in different languages, always eager to learn and pronounce what you share. My motivation is not to merely conform to the peculiar cultural norm of token representation, but rather, it’s a way to show my gratitude for the rich tapestry of your ancestry and culture, which has gifted us with your presence. Miigwech 💜
I remember and appreciated every poet who came to my high school writing program! I still read a lot of their works today. You may be the spark for some of those students, even if you don't know it.
My predecessor as Montana Poet Laureate, my friend Mark Gibbons, talks about James Welch coming to his school as being his impetus for becoming a poet. It is one of my favorite stories.
That Teddy Roosevelt quote is...something. Yeesh. I always hope that people who laud him (and Churchill, for that matter) for the good things they did (Russo-Japanese treaty, beating back the Nazis) are merely ignorant of the life-long attitudes such men expressed. It's the problem with "heroes"; they all have feet of clay. Better to make do without statues of men on horseback altogether.
Great observations, Chris. I tend to feel the same about most Zen dudes (who in my experience are also some of angriest... It doesn't help that my uncle knew one of the most awful Buddhist white dudes ever, Ösel Tendzin.) Seeing through the veneer of the colonial culture is very revealing and I thank you for helping improve my eyes. I've been avoiding using Anishinaabe words because I feel like I'm appropriating or signaling that I'm enlightened somehow, but I use bonjour when I'm in France, so why shouldn't I use miigwech while I'm in North America?
This sends my mind in a lot of positive, productive directions, Chris. Thank you.
I taught high school for a long time. One of the toughest things to do: Don’t let their overt disinterest be confused with actual disinterest. I’d bet plenty that many of these youth were impacted in surprising ways.
I sure appreciate your notions about language. I recall driving to Malta from Bozeman to pheasant hunt many times over the years. I loved listening to the word of the day from KGVA 88.1 out of Ft. Belknap for White Clay and Nakoda languages. I think the station is out of the Aaniiih Nakoda College. Language sharing can be uplifting, joyful, and fun. When I participate, I’m mindful of my ignorance but also of the pleasure and trust in language sharing.
“Don’t let their overt disinterest be confused with actual disinterest. I’d bet plenty that many of these youth were impacted in surprising ways.” I love this, and it’s so true, even for adults. Sometimes when I’m sharing something kind of dicey, people’s faces glaze over and they later say, “I never thought about it that way.” And I’m like, “Oh, that was your ‘I’m listening’ face? I thought it was your ‘I hate you’ face!” lol
Mahalo for this Chris. When I moved (back) to Hawaiʻi in 2005, I read something on an advice site, from another white settler, asserting that the only people who say "aloha" are newcomers, hotel receptionists and timeshare salespeople. That was confusing to me because the three people who had encouraged me to move when asked were all three born and raised here, one of them an activist and professor of Hawaiian epistemology, and they all not only started emails and conversations with "aloha" but had taught me additional words. So I asked, and their reply was pretty much what you just wrote: Donʻt you expect foreign visitors to learn "hello" and "thank you?" Now you moved to the kingdom of Hawaiʻi, and ʻōlelo Hawaiʻi is one of our legal languages, so it is a sign of respect for you to use the words you know, to learn place names, to learn to pronounce words properly - and to accept being corrected when you get it wrong or miss the nuance.
The other point that really hit home is one I try to catch myself on all the time - the difference between truly being haʻahaʻa (humble) and indulging in humble bragging. Like is humble bragging what I am doing in this comment? Maybe.
And then there are the times I have to figure out whether it is my place to speak up as an ally and when it is my place to just keep my mouth shut out of humility even when I "know" something. Like if I walk into that hotel with you, maybe I would roll my eyes if I knew we both shared the understanding. But would it be my place to try to educate someone who was oblivious? Or to catch the eye of a native-looking person and make a big assumption that we had a shared understanding?
These are the questions you ask all the time and for that I am grateful that you are writing and speaking your truth, and sharing it with a larger audience however uncomfortable it might make someone.
I appreciate this description of the “walking with”. I am an old white lady and often struggle with this notion of what it means to walk in humility with another human. I think it is part of my privilege to try to insert myself so the other knows that I know, even in something like composing this response. Maybe part of the walking with is that my experiences (including reading history, poetry, this letter) can add a different layer to my presence with another without having to share the exact experience; can add an additional opportunity to approach with open heart.
I never thought about the taxidermy/portraits of natives connection!! That is SO true. I also love the “you know one word, you say it with pride” advice 💓 finally: the pledge of allegiance said every day is NEVER NOT WEIRD. “What?! We’re in the army/classroom now?” I effin hate it
I hate the pledge. Not only is it... what's that word? Indoctrinating people into blind obedience, but it's also Christian. A double-whammy of ick, from my perspective.
At some point I began to say it as "one nation under law". Still not awesome ( I like the 4-H pledge much better) but at least it gets rid of that bit of -centrism.
I wouldn't even stand up for the pledge in high school when I was still (mostly) a fundamentalist Christian. Allegiance to a flag? Hell no.
Not that I would have put it exactly that way just yet.
I suppose I could have floated a false idols argument back then, but I came to my senses by senior year and realized I was surrounded by those everywhere. Later on it would become clear that the church I was breaking out of was contained in a bigger church, and so on, and so on, and so on.
Occasionally they hold something worth keeping--while walking out yet another set of doors.
The kids you're invited to speak to may not be listening, but in my experience some of the teachers are. Your words might be changing how they speak and think, and as their actions and language evolve, they're influencing students.
As the educator mentioned, you are correct, Chris's perspectives will improve and enhance the way I teach the Montana Native American Literature course that I have been teaching for nine years. If you'd like to see how I "speak and think," you're welcome to observe my class any time. Please don't make assumptions about how much educating I might be in need of...
Your classroom is one of the best ones I've ever been in, Alison. The books your students are reading, the books on the shelf ... everything. I love how you are challenging them in a very, very difficult community. When I walked in your classroom and saw the Essential Understandings poster front and center I knew I was in the right place. I have it in my writing lair too so that I can be reminded every time I turn my head. This educating business isn't a two-way street, it's a hellacious crossroads of incoming knowledge, thinkings and rethinkings, and everything else. Not to mention all the fucking politics influencing every little thing. I'm so grateful to teachers like you. ✊🏽
Oh no! I am so sorry my words were not clear and that it came across as an attack. Any teacher who would invite Chris into the classroom should only feel loved and supported! Let me try to explain what I meant, and hopefully I'm not just shoveling myself deeper (not that I've EVER done that, lol).
I participate in outreach with local youth in a topic that few find to be inherently interesting, at least at the outset. What I've noticed over the years, though, is that the chaperones (teachers, parents, student teachers, para aides, etc.) accompanying the groups from station to station seem to learn something, too. After several years, some of them have even started to repeat some of the things they previously learned to their groups of kids as part of an introduction. "Here's Kathleen! Last year I learned blah blah blah. Isn't that cool?"
The first book I ever bought with my own money was Dickenson's poems, mostly because of the poem that says "The show is not the show, but they that go." Another of my favorite poems is Kenneth Koch's "One train may hide another." There's a line that says something like "When you come to something, stop and let it pass so you can see what else is there."
I've always been drawn to the fact that whatever we think is going on may or may not be going on, and there is certainly a bunch of other stuff also going on. Heh. That will never be a poem. Thanks to those who can write them!
Anyway, I truly meant no harm, and I'm sorry I hurt you. Thank you for being such a good teacher and human being. We're sorely lacking in both.
Here's my shovel. Feel free to either beat me over the head with it or bury me in my ever-deepening hole. I'll probably be thinking about flies buzzing or wondering if these are the stars Emerson was talking about, instead of the stars I thought he was talking about.
Oct 28, 2023·edited Oct 28, 2023Liked by Chris La Tray
Thank you so much for this. I used to live in Spokane and when an event opened with a tribal welcome or greeting they always ended with a word that I heard as lemlemsh. I went searching and found a short video clip from the Salish School of Spokane with the pronunciations for the variations of the word, which means thank you (https://youtu.be/2FD6oKqcQBo?si=CSNolx2COGIrB5pk). I don't live in Spokane now but I occasionally get to hear someone speak who says that word and even though I'm white, it feels like being home again. I'd likely feel self-conscious saying it to a member of the tribe but I might try and then ask if that was acceptable, or ask first, to try to convey that I'm not seeking to co-opt someone else's language or culture but rather to honor it.
I speak English. Can get by in Spanish. Learning Chinese on Duolingo. All languages of empires.
I’ve seen other indigenous people advocate for schools teaching the languages of the people whose land they sit on. Love this idea.
Went deep in a Wikipedia hole to figure out what language that would be for me. There were about 2,000 Susquahannock people living here in 1600. We kept their name for the river. Their population dwindled until the last few were murdered, along with their language, by a racist vigilante group in 1763.
I could learn Kanienʼkéha (Mohawk, farther north) or Cherokee (farther south), which are in the same Haudenosaunee (Iroquois) language family.
Are you familiar with the Native Land project? It's helpful to find out who has lived at any particular place before it was colonized. Where possible, it has links to web sites and resources for specific tribes, as well. https://native-land.ca/
Had seen their app before but forgot about it! Thank you!! So good to know that some Conestoga-Susquehannock people are still out there, finding each other. Maybe I’ll update Wikipedia. https://www.conestogasusquehannocktribe.com/
Unclear from the website if there’s a way for me to learn some of the language. I sent a message to ask.
Yeah. There's a whole lot here I would like to converse with and if I still have eye power by the end of my morning I will come back and do so. But my couldn't-be-whiter ears hear you and I appreciate and will ponder your thoughts on language. I have never felt certain of my "right" to speak Native languages, but I have an embattled relationship to English, also at least partially based in trauma I think, but different from yours in that the violence of Christian, patriarchal cis/heteronormative culture that they originate in is supposed to be my culture. To say I have a love/hate relationship with it is entirely too mild.
In 1995 my ex-partner-now-queer-next-of-kin and I drove through Montana and much of the rural West on a roadtrip anchored by National Parks and college towns. She is visibly Jewish; I was visibly gender undecidable, not yet transitioned but, like her, extremely thin and short-haired and dykey. Outside of those parks and college towns, we encountered a barely restrained violent hostility while trying to transact the simple business of hotel rooms and food. Having left the Deep South a few years before for Seattle, neither of us were surprised, precisely. The experience was nothing new. But I think I was especially impressed--like physiologically changed--by the vast depth and openness of the land--and its vulnerability--and the contrast it presented to the absolute denial of welcome we received from the people in it. I love this land. The white folks in it? Hate is not quite right. Incomprehension is not right either: I understand them too well. I cannot wash the white off even if it feels alien to me.
And I could keep going with this story because it just keeps going. For now: one touchstone for me is Paul Celan, a 20th Century Eastern European Jewish poet who survived the Holocaust and wrote in German because it was literally his mother tongue. His poetry can be read as "academic" and "difficult", but I don't think it has to be. He was not trying to be obscure: he was trying to wring violence out the language and connection back in, to rehabilitate what language can do when it is not taken up as a weapon. His work draws me in like a dark northern forest awash with light few can see.
He did die of suicide in 1971, but I am not sure that means he failed. That said, his work--and not just his--is certainly unfinished in Western culture.
When the kid with the Cannibal Corpse tee shirt walked out of the classroom after talking with you, that is the first time I have seen him smile all year.
That alone makes it worth it...
This makes me very happy. I appreciate very much that you told me.
This was beautiful. I’m going to sit with what you said and read this again later.
I’m one of your newer subscribers, so forgive me if you’ve already addressed this: I’d love to hear the Anisinaabe words pronounced in a video or audio recording. I would love to learn how to say them properly in case I ever meet you in this world or some other. If this already exists, please point me to it!
Celeste, welcome! And here is a great resource right here, one that I use often:
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCFk1tCJQEH_BP4Kw6ckr4YQ
Another one is right here, which often has elders saying the words:
https://ojibwe.lib.umn.edu/
"It feels like life under genocidal occupation because it is."
Thank you for putting this out there, Chris. It often feels like that to me too but it's hard to talk about.
But back to the language discussion, if you speak American English — take heart! You already know dozens, maybe even hundreds, of Indigenous Turtle Island words. You can't even talk about the native plants and animals without speaking some Algonquian, for instance. Moose, caribou, raccoon, chipmunk, muskrat, persimmon, tamarack, squash, pecan, hickory, etc.
And that's just the tip of the ice burg for only one of the Indigenous language families that contributed to the flavor of English we currently speak. Maybe an additional way we can honor the languages of Turtle Island is to be mindful of all the Indigenous words we are already using?
There is certainly that. But I do think taking special care to know some specific words of the people where you are living is important.
Yep. It’s a “this, and …” kind of thing.
Wouldn’t it be fantastic if THIS was taught in “English and History” classes.
It would be.
“the vast majority of Indigenous folks have few, if any, of their traditional language near to their tongue” I am going to quote you while I reprimand people who snidely reject colonialism as a singular event of the past. I’d like to ask them, if it was indeed an event confined to the past with no present impact, how do we explain the loss of native languages and the widespread expectation for everyone to speak English?
I have a deep appreciation for learning new words in different languages, always eager to learn and pronounce what you share. My motivation is not to merely conform to the peculiar cultural norm of token representation, but rather, it’s a way to show my gratitude for the rich tapestry of your ancestry and culture, which has gifted us with your presence. Miigwech 💜
❤️
I remember and appreciated every poet who came to my high school writing program! I still read a lot of their works today. You may be the spark for some of those students, even if you don't know it.
My predecessor as Montana Poet Laureate, my friend Mark Gibbons, talks about James Welch coming to his school as being his impetus for becoming a poet. It is one of my favorite stories.
Agreed! You never know what seeds you're planting, which may not sprout until years down the road.
Yes. Especially since there is no room in HS to be your own individual self with your unique interests!
That Teddy Roosevelt quote is...something. Yeesh. I always hope that people who laud him (and Churchill, for that matter) for the good things they did (Russo-Japanese treaty, beating back the Nazis) are merely ignorant of the life-long attitudes such men expressed. It's the problem with "heroes"; they all have feet of clay. Better to make do without statues of men on horseback altogether.
Exactly.
Great observations, Chris. I tend to feel the same about most Zen dudes (who in my experience are also some of angriest... It doesn't help that my uncle knew one of the most awful Buddhist white dudes ever, Ösel Tendzin.) Seeing through the veneer of the colonial culture is very revealing and I thank you for helping improve my eyes. I've been avoiding using Anishinaabe words because I feel like I'm appropriating or signaling that I'm enlightened somehow, but I use bonjour when I'm in France, so why shouldn't I use miigwech while I'm in North America?
That's exactly what I mean, Thomas.
This sends my mind in a lot of positive, productive directions, Chris. Thank you.
I taught high school for a long time. One of the toughest things to do: Don’t let their overt disinterest be confused with actual disinterest. I’d bet plenty that many of these youth were impacted in surprising ways.
I sure appreciate your notions about language. I recall driving to Malta from Bozeman to pheasant hunt many times over the years. I loved listening to the word of the day from KGVA 88.1 out of Ft. Belknap for White Clay and Nakoda languages. I think the station is out of the Aaniiih Nakoda College. Language sharing can be uplifting, joyful, and fun. When I participate, I’m mindful of my ignorance but also of the pleasure and trust in language sharing.
“Don’t let their overt disinterest be confused with actual disinterest. I’d bet plenty that many of these youth were impacted in surprising ways.” I love this, and it’s so true, even for adults. Sometimes when I’m sharing something kind of dicey, people’s faces glaze over and they later say, “I never thought about it that way.” And I’m like, “Oh, that was your ‘I’m listening’ face? I thought it was your ‘I hate you’ face!” lol
I love it too.
Mahalo for this Chris. When I moved (back) to Hawaiʻi in 2005, I read something on an advice site, from another white settler, asserting that the only people who say "aloha" are newcomers, hotel receptionists and timeshare salespeople. That was confusing to me because the three people who had encouraged me to move when asked were all three born and raised here, one of them an activist and professor of Hawaiian epistemology, and they all not only started emails and conversations with "aloha" but had taught me additional words. So I asked, and their reply was pretty much what you just wrote: Donʻt you expect foreign visitors to learn "hello" and "thank you?" Now you moved to the kingdom of Hawaiʻi, and ʻōlelo Hawaiʻi is one of our legal languages, so it is a sign of respect for you to use the words you know, to learn place names, to learn to pronounce words properly - and to accept being corrected when you get it wrong or miss the nuance.
The other point that really hit home is one I try to catch myself on all the time - the difference between truly being haʻahaʻa (humble) and indulging in humble bragging. Like is humble bragging what I am doing in this comment? Maybe.
And then there are the times I have to figure out whether it is my place to speak up as an ally and when it is my place to just keep my mouth shut out of humility even when I "know" something. Like if I walk into that hotel with you, maybe I would roll my eyes if I knew we both shared the understanding. But would it be my place to try to educate someone who was oblivious? Or to catch the eye of a native-looking person and make a big assumption that we had a shared understanding?
These are the questions you ask all the time and for that I am grateful that you are writing and speaking your truth, and sharing it with a larger audience however uncomfortable it might make someone.
Miigwech, Beth, for all of this. Hell, it makes ME uncomfortable.
I appreciate this description of the “walking with”. I am an old white lady and often struggle with this notion of what it means to walk in humility with another human. I think it is part of my privilege to try to insert myself so the other knows that I know, even in something like composing this response. Maybe part of the walking with is that my experiences (including reading history, poetry, this letter) can add a different layer to my presence with another without having to share the exact experience; can add an additional opportunity to approach with open heart.
Itʻs about openness to keep learning, isnʻt it? Thank you for responding.
I never thought about the taxidermy/portraits of natives connection!! That is SO true. I also love the “you know one word, you say it with pride” advice 💓 finally: the pledge of allegiance said every day is NEVER NOT WEIRD. “What?! We’re in the army/classroom now?” I effin hate it
I hate the pledge. Not only is it... what's that word? Indoctrinating people into blind obedience, but it's also Christian. A double-whammy of ick, from my perspective.
✊🏽
At some point I began to say it as "one nation under law". Still not awesome ( I like the 4-H pledge much better) but at least it gets rid of that bit of -centrism.
I say "one nation under dog" 😂
Truly
I wouldn't even stand up for the pledge in high school when I was still (mostly) a fundamentalist Christian. Allegiance to a flag? Hell no.
Not that I would have put it exactly that way just yet.
I suppose I could have floated a false idols argument back then, but I came to my senses by senior year and realized I was surrounded by those everywhere. Later on it would become clear that the church I was breaking out of was contained in a bigger church, and so on, and so on, and so on.
Occasionally they hold something worth keeping--while walking out yet another set of doors.
The kids you're invited to speak to may not be listening, but in my experience some of the teachers are. Your words might be changing how they speak and think, and as their actions and language evolve, they're influencing students.
I bet you're educating the educators.
As the educator mentioned, you are correct, Chris's perspectives will improve and enhance the way I teach the Montana Native American Literature course that I have been teaching for nine years. If you'd like to see how I "speak and think," you're welcome to observe my class any time. Please don't make assumptions about how much educating I might be in need of...
Your classroom is one of the best ones I've ever been in, Alison. The books your students are reading, the books on the shelf ... everything. I love how you are challenging them in a very, very difficult community. When I walked in your classroom and saw the Essential Understandings poster front and center I knew I was in the right place. I have it in my writing lair too so that I can be reminded every time I turn my head. This educating business isn't a two-way street, it's a hellacious crossroads of incoming knowledge, thinkings and rethinkings, and everything else. Not to mention all the fucking politics influencing every little thing. I'm so grateful to teachers like you. ✊🏽
Oh no! I am so sorry my words were not clear and that it came across as an attack. Any teacher who would invite Chris into the classroom should only feel loved and supported! Let me try to explain what I meant, and hopefully I'm not just shoveling myself deeper (not that I've EVER done that, lol).
I participate in outreach with local youth in a topic that few find to be inherently interesting, at least at the outset. What I've noticed over the years, though, is that the chaperones (teachers, parents, student teachers, para aides, etc.) accompanying the groups from station to station seem to learn something, too. After several years, some of them have even started to repeat some of the things they previously learned to their groups of kids as part of an introduction. "Here's Kathleen! Last year I learned blah blah blah. Isn't that cool?"
The first book I ever bought with my own money was Dickenson's poems, mostly because of the poem that says "The show is not the show, but they that go." Another of my favorite poems is Kenneth Koch's "One train may hide another." There's a line that says something like "When you come to something, stop and let it pass so you can see what else is there."
I've always been drawn to the fact that whatever we think is going on may or may not be going on, and there is certainly a bunch of other stuff also going on. Heh. That will never be a poem. Thanks to those who can write them!
Anyway, I truly meant no harm, and I'm sorry I hurt you. Thank you for being such a good teacher and human being. We're sorely lacking in both.
Here's my shovel. Feel free to either beat me over the head with it or bury me in my ever-deepening hole. I'll probably be thinking about flies buzzing or wondering if these are the stars Emerson was talking about, instead of the stars I thought he was talking about.
Thank you so much for this. I used to live in Spokane and when an event opened with a tribal welcome or greeting they always ended with a word that I heard as lemlemsh. I went searching and found a short video clip from the Salish School of Spokane with the pronunciations for the variations of the word, which means thank you (https://youtu.be/2FD6oKqcQBo?si=CSNolx2COGIrB5pk). I don't live in Spokane now but I occasionally get to hear someone speak who says that word and even though I'm white, it feels like being home again. I'd likely feel self-conscious saying it to a member of the tribe but I might try and then ask if that was acceptable, or ask first, to try to convey that I'm not seeking to co-opt someone else's language or culture but rather to honor it.
Salish is the language of where I live here in Missoula. Lemlemsh is one of the few words of that language I actually know!
I speak English. Can get by in Spanish. Learning Chinese on Duolingo. All languages of empires.
I’ve seen other indigenous people advocate for schools teaching the languages of the people whose land they sit on. Love this idea.
Went deep in a Wikipedia hole to figure out what language that would be for me. There were about 2,000 Susquahannock people living here in 1600. We kept their name for the river. Their population dwindled until the last few were murdered, along with their language, by a racist vigilante group in 1763.
I could learn Kanienʼkéha (Mohawk, farther north) or Cherokee (farther south), which are in the same Haudenosaunee (Iroquois) language family.
Are you familiar with the Native Land project? It's helpful to find out who has lived at any particular place before it was colonized. Where possible, it has links to web sites and resources for specific tribes, as well. https://native-land.ca/
I love looking at that Native Land site.
Had seen their app before but forgot about it! Thank you!! So good to know that some Conestoga-Susquehannock people are still out there, finding each other. Maybe I’ll update Wikipedia. https://www.conestogasusquehannocktribe.com/
Unclear from the website if there’s a way for me to learn some of the language. I sent a message to ask.
The story of the Conestoga-Susquehannock finding each other gives me hope!
This is a massive resource. Love it, thank you for bringing it to my awareness.
Yeah. There's a whole lot here I would like to converse with and if I still have eye power by the end of my morning I will come back and do so. But my couldn't-be-whiter ears hear you and I appreciate and will ponder your thoughts on language. I have never felt certain of my "right" to speak Native languages, but I have an embattled relationship to English, also at least partially based in trauma I think, but different from yours in that the violence of Christian, patriarchal cis/heteronormative culture that they originate in is supposed to be my culture. To say I have a love/hate relationship with it is entirely too mild.
In 1995 my ex-partner-now-queer-next-of-kin and I drove through Montana and much of the rural West on a roadtrip anchored by National Parks and college towns. She is visibly Jewish; I was visibly gender undecidable, not yet transitioned but, like her, extremely thin and short-haired and dykey. Outside of those parks and college towns, we encountered a barely restrained violent hostility while trying to transact the simple business of hotel rooms and food. Having left the Deep South a few years before for Seattle, neither of us were surprised, precisely. The experience was nothing new. But I think I was especially impressed--like physiologically changed--by the vast depth and openness of the land--and its vulnerability--and the contrast it presented to the absolute denial of welcome we received from the people in it. I love this land. The white folks in it? Hate is not quite right. Incomprehension is not right either: I understand them too well. I cannot wash the white off even if it feels alien to me.
And I could keep going with this story because it just keeps going. For now: one touchstone for me is Paul Celan, a 20th Century Eastern European Jewish poet who survived the Holocaust and wrote in German because it was literally his mother tongue. His poetry can be read as "academic" and "difficult", but I don't think it has to be. He was not trying to be obscure: he was trying to wring violence out the language and connection back in, to rehabilitate what language can do when it is not taken up as a weapon. His work draws me in like a dark northern forest awash with light few can see.
He did die of suicide in 1971, but I am not sure that means he failed. That said, his work--and not just his--is certainly unfinished in Western culture.
And.. I need more coffee. For this:
miigwech
thank you
danke schön
I'm happy you're here, Erik.
You've inspired me (and clearly other readers) to learn five words.
Your classroom visit might not have yielded immediate fruit, but the seeds of the retelling are taking root in this community.
I appreciate that very much.
I treasure that July 4th post of yours and have made several people listen to it out loud.
I appreciate that!